Didn\'t know where to put this thread at...

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Saphster
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Didn\'t know where to put this thread at...

Post by Saphster » Wed Feb 07, 2007 8:30 pm

I am REALLY angry right now. My mom threw a plat into my face. Shoved it. Literally.

Why? I don't fucking know. And I really need to let out my frustration somehow!!!!!!!! I f_ckin hate how she treats me. When I'm on the phone she's mad, and when I'm locked up inside all day, doing nothing talking to no one that's when she's happy. IT's as if she wants me to be miserable. I seriously want to leave this house. The only reason I stayed in New Orleans after hurricane katrina was because of Cordarryl (man I love), and she doesn't even understand that situation! She listens to other people's racist remarks about him, especially my aunt who thinks ONLY white people are the best rate.

This is the fucking 21st century people. No race is superior than the other! And no one is better than another because they are a lighter skin tone. It's like no matter what I do I always upset them. I am tired of living, and abiding by their way of life. I want to be happy too damnit! I want to live freely, and feel loved without having to hide it....

I'm crying now because I hate how low I've stooped to feeling like this....I try to stay strong, and have faith that God will answer my prayers for a better life, but why is all this happening to me? Why am I getting more hurt day by day? It's just not fair.....

I'm a good person. I don't judge other people by their race. I refuse to think that just because a person has a different skin tone they're lower than me! I DO NOT want to live that way. I am an adult now. That's what she refuses to understand. My mother needs to face reality, and understand that I'm grown now. I'm in college. I need her to be more understanding, and not jugdemental, and not to mention MATURE!!

I'm just tired of feeling this way....The only reason why I don't kill myself already is because I love Cordarryl too much, and have faith in God....if not I wouldn't even have typed this..
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\\\"My fans are still there. They still love me. They\\\'re alive.\\\" -Michael Jackson.

stangetheman@YAHOO.COM
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Didn\'t know where to put this thread at...

Post by stangetheman@YAHOO.COM » Thu Feb 08, 2007 5:29 am

Baby girl you need to leave and do you on thing but the right way. Do have a job if not get one so you can have you on stuff plan it out go to school if you can absent makes the heart grow fonder. Your mom will change once you leave she will start to mess things change keep the faith. You can do it I do not Know you but I beleave in you.I no it hurts but it will pass.

mysteriousone
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Didn\'t know where to put this thread at...

Post by mysteriousone » Thu Feb 08, 2007 6:47 am

*Wraps arms around Sappy and gives her a big hug*

Hun, you sure sound like you're going through a rough time right now! :( I'm so sorry to hear about the way your mom is treating you! Have you sat her down and asked her why she is treating you this way? Is there anybody you can talk to who may be able to help you and your mom? Your mom definitely needs help if she's shoving plates in your face! :blink: That part worries me the most! :( Let's face it though, Sapphy, you will always be your mom's little girl, always--she will most probably still be telling you what and what not to do when you're well into your 20's, or 30's even--it's just the way mom's are! They don't mean any harm, they can't handle the fact that their little girl has grown up, that is all! Not all mom's but most mom's are like that! Like I mentioned before, try talking to her.........and if things still don't get sorted out, talk to someone you can trust and hopefully they can help you! Always remember though, other's go through the same thing every day, all over the world, you're not alone..........this will pass, I promise you! It won't be too long and you'll be finished college and able to get a job, then you and your boyfriend can get a place of your own and live your own lives! (Just thinking about that, surely makes you feel a tad better) :wub:

Hang in there and keep your chin up! Let us know how everything goes, okay?

Love

Mysti!
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Thank you, Veronica! :wub:[/align]

Saphster
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Didn\'t know where to put this thread at...

Post by Saphster » Mon Feb 12, 2007 3:55 pm

[QUOTE=mysteriousone;185296]*Wraps arms around Sappy and gives her a big hug*

Hun, you sure sound like you're going through a rough time right now! :( I'm so sorry to hear about the way your mom is treating you! Have you sat her down and asked her why she is treating you this way? Is there anybody you can talk to who may be able to help you and your mom? Your mom definitely needs help if she's shoving plates in your face! :blink: That part worries me the most! :( Let's face it though, Sapphy, you will always be your mom's little girl, always--she will most probably still be telling you what and what not to do when you're well into your 20's, or 30's even--it's just the way mom's are! They don't mean any harm, they can't handle the fact that their little girl has grown up, that is all! Not all mom's but most mom's are like that! Like I mentioned before, try talking to her.........and if things still don't get sorted out, talk to someone you can trust and hopefully they can help you! Always remember though, other's go through the same thing every day, all over the world, you're not alone..........this will pass, I promise you! It won't be too long and you'll be finished college and able to get a job, then you and your boyfriend can get a place of your own and live your own lives! (Just thinking about that, surely makes you feel a tad better) :wub:

Hang in there and keep your chin up! Let us know how everything goes, okay?

Love

Mysti![/QUOTE]

I know I will always be her little girl. That's what the hardest part!:lol She has to know that I'm an adult now. And she's not the kind of person I can sit down, and talk to. Trust me myst I tried many times. It's like she's trying to shove all the serious-ness in, and pretends she can't hear me, or ignores it, and doesn't take me seriously.

She's in complete denial about my age, and thoughts. I guess she just can't believe that I used to be the 5 years old girl that used to cry when she'd leave me alone, and now I'm this 18 yr old college girl trying to make a living, and be independent, and talk to other people, and can't believe im in serious relationships now.

Plus, my aunt who is staying with her really drills thoughts into her head. BAD ONES. She doesn't like my friends. (I only have 2 by the way.:rolleyes: ) And says to m mom that she has to be careful because I have an attitude, and I'm ungrateful. She even says I'm what is going to cause my mother to die. What kind of **** is that to tell me?:chairbeat She thinks her daughter is the only perfect girl out there. Her daughter had a very depressed childhood, and adolescent. I know because she told me. I don't want to feel like that when I get older.

My aunt is the real drive to my mother's change of attitude....she tells her stuff like "Races shouldn't mix. It's disgraceful. It's even in the bible that seeds shouldn't mix." I'm just sitting there like WTF, YOU're freaking lying man! She can keep believing that if she wants. My mom just sits there, and ponders about it. She doesn't know what side to choose, her daughter's, or everyone of her family members. I don't blame her really. I don't want to bring shame, but my aunt and I have very different beliefs....

I think my mother knows that and she's going through trauma in her head because she's undecided herself....




:(
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\\\"My fans are still there. They still love me. They\\\'re alive.\\\" -Michael Jackson.

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