Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

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Purdy Young Thang
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by Purdy Young Thang » Wed Nov 10, 2004 12:33 am

Ey, ey ey!!
The PuYoTha is back with another one of her crazy, insanity-filled courtroom parodies. This was written today off a mad sugar rush (lots of bubblegum and ginger ale o_o), and is the 4th episode in this series!

I guess it was a good break from Pretty Singer (which I am still writing, foo's!).

Oh yeah, and this heavily inspired it. Sponsored in part by: Gas-E-Pop! XD Thank you, Badine!!

Enjoy, people!

***

The people are REAL. The cases are REAL. Soda is $1.50.

(Courtroom scene. The jury is composed of various MJ fans, non-fans, and plain weirdos. The judge stand is empty.)

Jury member #1 [Jan]: My friends, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but...
Jury member #2 [Badine]: What?
Jury member #3 [Nane/Darkbrowneye]: Meh, she's just being a drama queen! I'm sure it's nothing.
Jan: I have to inform you that... we are OUT of soda.
Jury member #4 [Sez/Sweetiepie]: WHAT?!!
Badine: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Nane: *rips her hair out* o_o
Jan: And...and the vending machine is out of order. *her voice cracks* I-I'm so sorry, you guys...
Sez: That's it, there's NO way we're getting through another one of these sessions now! We're done for!!
Jan: Dude, relax!
Nane: ... I have tea.
All: .... *crickets*
Jan: WE'RE SAVED!

*MEANWHILE...*

(Michael is preparing for his appearance, with his siblings Janet and Jermaine by his side.)

Janet: Mike, c'mon, let's go!
Michael: Almost ready! *he takes a bottle of Pepsi and drinks*
Janet: I know you're nervous and all, but-- ...man, that's the 5th bottle you've had already. Don't you think you've had enough?
Michael: I'LL TELL YOU WHEN I'VE HAD ENOUGH!
Janet: .... o_o 'K.
Michael: I'm gonna need another tall one for this... *takes another bottle with him and goes*

Decisions are FINAL. THIS is JUDGING JACKSON.

With an ALL-STAR cast of (in crap-abetical order).....:
*introductory, court-show music plays*

TOM SMELLDON! *Tom walks into the courtroom, and poses with a really cheeky, hideous grin and holding up a pair of handcuffs*
DIANE DEMON! *Diane stumbles in as well and looks into the camera with a court paper reading "COURT ORDER OF SUCKINESS"*
GLORIA ALLBAD! *Gloria trots on in, holds up a photo of MJ and his kids and rips it in half, then we hear something else rip in half and Gloria looking behind her at her pants, grimace on her face*
And also starring MARTIN "FARTY MARTY" BASHIR!!

*loud rock 'n' roll music starts playing as Martin comes out, spins on the floor and starts dancing*

Martin: *singing the Contours* I can mashed potato! I can do the twist! TELL ME BABAY! Do ya like it like dis?! *turns around and attempts to backflip and buttdance at the same time but ends up falling over with his big stinky butt in the air, and he gets dragged off by guards*

Jan: Well, thank God THAT ended quickly.
Sez: Though some of us could have done without the traumatic, eye-scarring experience.
Jury member #5 [Spicy/MJSpice]: *twitching on the floor* Gerard? Is that you? I see the light, Gerry!! *SMACK* OW! I'm okay...

(The bailiff calls the court to order, as the judge walks in. He takes his stand. There are more Tylenols by his side.)

Bailiff: ALL RISE BEFORE THE HONORABLE....

(The jury stands up in unison. Michael is there, in his usual place, and downing an entire bottle of soda at once -- you can even hear him drinking. Janet, Jermaine, Joseph and Katherine are staring.)

Nane: So THAT'S where that soda went...

(Two people come and take their stands.)

Defendant MICHAEL JACKSON is suing the plaintiff TOM SNEDDON for public harrassment, false accusations, malpractice, slander, oh... you should know what he's like by now.

Tom: Finally, an up-close and personal case review with the one and only... Michael Joseph Jackson.
Michael: *STILL drinking, can't speak*
Tom: *leers closely at him, his face close to Michael's* So, this is what you do before your court dates, huh? Not even trial yet and you're a raving alcoholic. Nice. This CAN'T be good for your career. *smirks. Behind him, grown-up people of the jury look serious and ominous*

Katherine: *quietly, to Joe* This isn't going as well as I'd hoped...
Joseph: I know. Yeesh, there's no way I'll get a chance to get into that bathroom later...
Katherine: JOE!

Michael: *puts down the bottle* Aaahhh.
Tom: *overhearing Katherine and Joe* That's right, Mr. Jackson. *still practically breathing into Michael's face* Because you've made a few mistakes, that's where your career, your life, your future is going: straight down the toilet.

(Dramatic moment of silence)

Michael: *burps loudly in Tom's face* *cartoony record scratch noise* Scuse me.
Tom: ....
Michael: *belch*
Tom: *eye twitches* *backs away slowly*
Michael: *BUUUURP* *covers mouth with his hand, very embarrassed*
Janet: Okay, dude, this is like, getting out of hand. Stoppit.

(A moment later)

Tom: As I was sa--
Michael: *brrAAAAAAaaAAuurp!*
Jermaine: Ahh, Mike!
Michael: *buuuu-urp* Wait-wait-wait-wait, long one comin' up. *pause* *brrAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAp*

Sez: Whoa, awesome!

Michael: Well, that's it, I'm never sponsoring Pepsi again.
Tom: *monotone* So not only is he a freak, but an ill-mannered freak. Not to mention a non-law-abiding one... you see this, Your Honor? Disgraceful.
Judge: *long sigh* I don't think I have the patience to make a ruling yet... let's see how this goes. Although I think SOMEONE should limit his fluid intake.
Janet: Amen to that!

Tom: Anyway, Your Honor, as I was about to summarize for you, our cas--
Michael: *BAAAAWRP* ... Sushi? When was the last time I had sushi? ... Oooo, vintage.
Random jury member (an old woman): Ugh, that was outright disgusting!

(Some jury members are laughing, even those that looked the most humorless earlier.)

Badine: I want sushi too! *burps* Oh, 'scuse me.
Jan: *burp* Sorry. Had somm'a Michael's soda.
Jury member #6 [Amrai/Marialovesmjj]: *burps*

(Our familiar MJEOL jury members are trying desperately not to burst out laughing.)

Judge: UGH! That is TRULY enough!
Tom: He isn't taking this seriously!!! He's nothing but a mentally-disturbed little man with no sense of reality in his mind! He lives in an *amusement park* for God's sake!!!
Judge: Mr. Sneddon, please be quiet...
Tom: NO! Does the word SLEEPOVERS mean anything to you?! I have to let the world know that their beloved entertainer is nothing but a conniving, indecent, completely immoral, mannerless --
Judge: MR. SNEDDON! Perhaps YOU'RE the one taking things too seriously, sir...
Tom: *turns to judge in shock, mouth gaping open, but doesn't say anything* ... But I.... he..... the kid.... I...
Judge: All premises aside, I rule in favor of Michael Jackson. Mr. Sneddon, do calm down. You haven't even brought up your case or even any supporting evidence. Stop harassing Mr. Jackson, and for heaven's sakes, give that man some Pepto Bismol! Yeeesh! *he grabs his briefcase and runs out, the rest of the jury following*
Sneddon: Get me outta here!!! I'll come back for YOU, Jackson! *RUNS*

*pause* (No one is left but Michael and his family, and the girls.)

Michael: *buuUUUUUUUUUrrp!*
Janet: Haha, aren't WE sophisticated. WOO! Big round of applause for my burping brother!........Mike, that was the most disgusting, embarrassing, display I've ever seen.
Michael: *hides his face shyly* I'm sorry... just happened, I guess.
Janet: *shakes his hand* Congrats, champ. You finally managed to beat Jermaine after all these years.
Jermaine: HEY!


THE END

Michael: *BURP* Admit it. *brAAAwrp* Do I sound ill-mannered to you?



THE REAL END!

--I apologize for being so rude, crude, childish and disgusting XD
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mj_fan_for_life31
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by mj_fan_for_life31 » Wed Nov 10, 2004 12:41 am

fuuuuuuuuunny!!!

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Keep_The_Faith1
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by Keep_The_Faith1 » Wed Nov 10, 2004 4:20 am

:laugh

privacy
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by privacy » Wed Nov 10, 2004 5:48 am

LMAO you weird.. weird.. freak.

Love ya for it :D
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Badine
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by Badine » Wed Nov 10, 2004 6:02 am

LOL!!!! I am laughing so hard! I always love your parodies!

choccyclaire
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by choccyclaire » Wed Nov 10, 2004 9:08 am

omg lmao :laugh that was great!

burrpppppppp excuse me

Nayru
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by Nayru » Wed Nov 10, 2004 9:36 pm

LOL!!!!!! :laugh :laugh :crackingu
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MJSpice
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by MJSpice » Wed Nov 10, 2004 10:26 pm

Hee hee! U got me right! XD! Great Parody!!! :D:D
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DarkChild
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by DarkChild » Wed Nov 10, 2004 10:46 pm

LOL fluid intake :laugh
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marialovesmjj
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by marialovesmjj » Thu Nov 11, 2004 3:24 am

Oh the crazyness. lol. Good job yet again. :D
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by Mikey's Angel » Thu Nov 11, 2004 5:38 am

Ooooh..here's one....BUUUUURWWWWWWPPP!!!!!! omg...excuse me...:drinkingb ahem..I loooved it...fookin' hillarious!!:crackingu:crackingu

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:bigfart Ooops..! sowwie!!
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Michael Jackson's Kougra
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by Michael Jackson's Kougra » Thu Nov 11, 2004 8:15 am

you better hurry up and update!!!

I started my own, because I was bored waiting....

glad you like my one!!!
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choccyclaire
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by choccyclaire » Thu Nov 11, 2004 9:10 am

Originally posted by Michael Jackson's Kougra
you better hurry up and update!!!
huh i thought that was it..she finished it? says the end?

Purdy Young Thang
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by Purdy Young Thang » Thu Nov 11, 2004 5:40 pm

OH NO! That's just the end of this episode.

Sorry to keep you all waiting forever. ^^;;;; If you like I can post the other 3 older eps for you to see!
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Michael Jackson's Kougra
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Another mad courtroom parody by the JJ :D

Post by Michael Jackson's Kougra » Thu Nov 11, 2004 5:42 pm

please do Jan!!! I never so the other two! I sure the first but not those, send them to me by PM!!
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