How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

How do you feel about Michael Jackson? Got any info you want to share?

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oldschoolfan
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by oldschoolfan » Wed Jul 01, 2009 9:57 pm

I thought it might be good to share with each other how we all found out about Michael a few days ago, and what was your first initial reaction?

I think I might have already posted my story somewhere, or maybe I just told a few of you, but I'll share it again.

I had to do work experience at an animal shelter for the course I am currently doing, so I had to get up really early to go meet up with the other people in my group. When I got up I went to open my bedroom door and I suddenly had this surge of fear go through me, and I could not bring myself to leave the room. I live by myself so I do get scared sometimes, but this time it was FEAR, to the point that I had even considered climbing through my bedroom window, and I had to put my ear up against the door and listen to see if someone was there. I truly felt like someone was in my house, and every time I went to open the door that surge of fear can back. I literally couldn't put my hands on the door without thinking something REALLY bad was about to happen. But eventually I had to leave my room, and I checked my whole house to make sure. Even then, when I left my house I basically ran out and left all the lights on. No that I think of it, it may have been 'someone' there telling me something bad was about to happen, or just be there for me, I don't know, but it was odd.

While I was at the bus stop I sat there wondering what had made me so terrified, then as I stood up for the bus I suddenly got this pain in my heart and the first thing I could think of was a heart attack, not that I thought i was having one, but you know those thoughts you just get.

Then when I finally met up with the others and we were about half way to the shelter the news came on the radio, and the very first thing they said was 'Michael Jackson has just died'. The radio was down really low so I thought 'they couldn't have just said what I think they just said' but obviously the radio got cranked up. I felt sick, and I kept thinking it must just be another rumour, but I was begging for the radio to be turned off so I wouldn't have to listen because I knew if it was confirmed I couldn't get through the day. Then sudenly my phone went off and I knew that it was my mum telling me. I didn't want to read it but I did, and i told her I jus heard it too. She said she heard he might just be in a coma. She old me later she really didn't want to have message me because she knew I had to get through the day, but she had to let me know. A little later on my cousin messaged me asking me if I was okay because she had just heard.

I thought once I got to the shelter i wouldn't have to hear about it, but if it couldn't be rubbed in my face any more, the radio was playing through the whole shelter so no matter where I went all I could here was 'Michael Jackson is dead' and all these people calling up crying, and all his songs playing. Now if you want to absolutely torture someone... I will never know how I got through the day.

On the way home I demanded that there will be NO radio, I had got so far, and oneof the people with me thought it was okay to have a laugh at me. :8-26-03ranting: I was so relieved when i got back, and the fisrt moment nobody was there I cried, and I cried all the way home on the bus, and I got into the ugly cry when I got home. As dumb as it sounds, I went into the city in the hope of finding a group of fans, but I didn't, so I went to my mums, and have pretty much been here for a week, I am about to challenge myself into going home tonight, she said I can come back if I'm still sad. I think it's more being alone with my thoughts, and having the urge to turn on the tv that I'm worried about.

I found out a few days ago that Michael had his heart attack at the same time that I got that pain in my chest, wether or not I'm reading into it too much I don't know, bu that morning was very strange, even before I knew, I didn't feel okay.

If you feel like sharing your story (sorry about how much I wrote!) feel free, it has made me feel a little better sharing it.
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by mskim0928 » Wed Jul 01, 2009 10:40 pm

I remember signing on to the computer in the morning, and hearing that Farrah Fawcett had passed away. I read the article on Yahoo! News, checked my e-mail, and went about my day.

Later in the afternoon, I realized I forgot to pay a bill. I logged on to my computer again, and since my homepage is Yahoo! I was immediately faced with the headline "Michael Jackson dies". I remember basically going into shock. My mind went blank and numb. Then my heart hit the floor. I didn't even read the little blurb below the headline, I immediately clicked on the story. The whole time I was waiting for the article to come up I was thinking, hoping, PRAYING it wasn't true, that it was just another rumor...but inside I just knew it was true. I remember sitting there just saying, "Oh my God" over and over again. I kept reading the same paragraph over and over, but not comprehending...not wanting to comprehend or read any further. My boyfriend asked me what was wrong and I told him Michael was dead. He said, "What?!?".

I then called my mom. I told her that I had just read online that Michael had died. She said, "What?? Oh my God!" She told me they had coverage on CNN, so I turned on the TV and it stayed on that channel the rest of the night.

I had to go grocery shopping. While shopping, I'd be fine one minute and the next minute I'd remember Michael was gone, and I'd feel so empty. It seemed so surreal. I couldn't comprehend it. In my mind he just wasn't ever supposed to die.

I came home and they were showing an old interview with Michael. I heard his voice, and the tears started. My boyfriend just held me while I cried like a little girl. It seemed dumb since I had never met Michael in person (:( ), but then it seemed right because I was hurting - and what I felt was REAL.

The rest of the days since then I have been watching his videos, coming here to MJEOL, connecting with other fans, and finding my own way to pay tribute to a man who was so important in my life for so long. I don't know when or if the pain will ever stop...but I know Michael would want us to go on and keep his memory alive.

:michaeljacksonicon: I love you, Michael! :wub:

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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by oldschoolfan » Wed Jul 01, 2009 11:12 pm

[QUOTE=mskim0928;211886]

The rest of the days since then I have been watching his videos, coming here to MJEOL, connecting with other fans, and finding my own way to pay tribute to a man who was so important in my life for so long. I don't know when or if the pain will ever stop...but I know Michael would want us to go on and keep his memory alive.
[QUOTE]

The pain will always be there, wounds will heal but you'll always be left with the scars to remind you.

I have been coming back on here a LOT since Michael died, I'm glad I came back to MJEOL when I did, I used to be on here as MJslave years ago but I have to admit I left because of peoples attitudes. That was at least 3-4 years ago though. But those people seem to have gone, and it feels like a COMMUNITY again, so it has made me feel supported.
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by danaluvsmj » Wed Jul 01, 2009 11:43 pm

That afternoon my sister called me and told me she heard on the radio he was sent to the hospital for a heart attack or some heart problem. I thought it was probably just some exaggerated rumor, but she said 'No, this is serious.He might not make it.'

I came on here and found out he was at the hospital, then was in a coma.I turned on CNN and prayed for God not to take him. Then the headline read that he had died, but it was unconfirmed. I just started crying and broke down.My sister came home and we both hugged and cried. All I could say was 'I want to go too!':(
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by Saphster » Wed Jul 01, 2009 11:45 pm

From someone who hates Michael.

That day I didn't watch TV, listen to the radio, or go on the internet. I recorded a video on my camera for youtube but never uploaded it. My afternoon was spent on getting ready for my boyfriend's graduation. That night my mom and I left the graduation and were driving home, it was like 9pm. She got a phone call from her sister saying that Michael was rushed to the hospital earlier and died. My mom said, "MICHAEL JACKSON DIED?!" I said "WHAAAAT?!" And I kid you not I almost crashed. About 3 times. Turned on the radio, Michael songs playing....I was hoping it was just a hoax....

Went home, got on MJEOL....it was true...
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by HeavenSent » Wed Jul 01, 2009 11:47 pm

I have been coming back on here a LOT since Michael died, I'm glad I came back to MJEOL when I did, I used to be on here as MJslave years ago but I have to admit I left because of peoples attitudes. That was at least 3-4 years ago though. But those people seem to have gone, and it feels like a COMMUNITY again, so it has made me feel supported.

^yeah. 3-4 years ago, MJEOL was not the same place I'd first fallen in love with. Alot of us got caught up, including myself. But the beauty of what's happening now is that our coming together feels so genuine to me. I hope it lasts :)

To answer the opening post's question, I was sitting in my living room about to eat and watch T.V. when programming was interrupted. As soon as more detail starting coming in, I immediately logged in to MJEOL. I posted the Breaking News thread, SO afraid of even remotely anticipating the worst. I think I found comfort with Leah and the others who didn't want to get overly concerned.

But alas...


My first inclination as soon as it was made official was to pace and talk to God. But I remained online at MJEOL and will never forget feeling like I was in the presence of my 2nd family.
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by SpecialJanet25 » Thu Jul 02, 2009 12:07 am

I was sitting at my computer and I receive an email stating that Michael was rush to hopstial. My heart was pounding so fast, I didn't understand what was happening. I was on twitter and then I came here when Carla started the thread about the topic. I will say a few minutes later, my friend was saying he had died. I say no, he's not dead. he's not. I was even on myspace, where were people were saying RIP, even on twitter they were saying he has passed and I'm like stop saying that. It has not been confirm until finally I went MJJ Community Forum and found out it was true.
I break down and cry so hard. I was all alone. This is one of the worse news I have ever heard. Now My life will never be the same again without Michael. His untimely death is destroy a part of my life.
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by mjhb29 » Thu Jul 02, 2009 12:13 am

The day it happened all day I felt like something was wrong but I thought it was because Farrah had just passed that morning but it kept coming back. I went on Twitter to check what people were saying when it was written that Michael was in the hospital.

I imediately went to yahoo to see if there was any news and while I was looking at the page, my heart sank. The first thing after that I did was turn on the tv and they broke regular programming and said that Michael had just died. I started screaming and crying hoping that what I was feeling wasn't true. My mom came in to see what the problem was and she held me as I cried my ugly cry for it seemed like forever.

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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by mskim0928 » Thu Jul 02, 2009 12:16 am

oldschoolfan;211890 wrote:
mskim0928;211886 wrote:

The rest of the days since then I have been watching his videos, coming here to MJEOL, connecting with other fans, and finding my own way to pay tribute to a man who was so important in my life for so long. I don't know when or if the pain will ever stop...but I know Michael would want us to go on and keep his memory alive.

The pain will always be there, wounds will heal but you'll always be left with the scars to remind you.

I have been coming back on here a LOT since Michael died, I'm glad I came back to MJEOL when I did, I used to be on here as MJslave years ago but I have to admit I left because of peoples attitudes. That was at least 3-4 years ago though. But those people seem to have gone, and it feels like a COMMUNITY again, so it has made me feel supported.
Aha! I remember you as MJslave! I was MrsBigE at that time. After MJ was found innocent, I admit I didn't come back here for a long time. Mainly because I was going through a divorce and becoming Ms. Kim (lol). Anyway, everyone on here has been great and it's been a great source of comfort. I'm glad we met too! :D

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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by Purdy Young Thang » Thu Jul 02, 2009 1:09 am

Saphster- I too was told of Michael's passing by someone who hates him.


My father had informed me that Michael was hospitalized and he didn't know why. Before this happened I was just going about my day, kinda emotional already because I'd realized an important memory in my life 10 years prior, and also Farrah Fawcett's passing affected me too.

I actually was in the process of mourning the great David Carradine, who passed weeks earlier. And I think it was this same day I also heard about Ed McMahon, too. Earlier in the day I was upset by all these passings and wondered, "Is this the month of massive death or something? Why are all these people passing like this??"


How little I knew.


I had finished everything I was doing, and already had the urge to come downstairs and check stuff on the 'net, with no clue what I was about to be hit with.

So I came down after Dad gave me this notice, not alarmed at all because this has happened before, and I was thinking: "Aw, poor baby... he's probably got some flu, or just sniffles, or--"


And then I saw the headline. "Dead at 50."



I froze. My mind went blank, my brain short circuited and my heart PANICKED.


I started shaking and crying. My mom rushed over because she followed me downstairs in my alertness (she's an MJ fan too) and we both saw the headline..and she held me and I just shook and kept saying "It's not true..it's not true..." and thought it was a cruel hoax.


I went upstairs, running, checked the news channels- they all said the SAME thing.


I wanted to die. Right there. Mom and I hugged and cried.



I find it ironic, now, that my father was the one to inform me (sorta) of Michael's passing- when just today he'd picked a fight with me and took to insulting Michael heavily in ALL manners you don't want to know about and saying I was sick, crazy and a mental case for grieving so heavily for 5 days, JUST because I idolized the man and I came to him like this today: wondering just how much else was going to go wrong and I know this sounds bad but what else have I got to live for and can you help me, Dad?


I defended Michael just as heavily and I'm proud of that. I said Michael can still hear you so DON'T you say anything like that about him.


So why did I attempt to emotionally confide in my father today, knowing he absolutely didn't feel for Michael like I do?
Because he'd ignored me /since/ he saw my initial emotional reaction to this on the 25th, and I needed some serious consolation.



Since that day I've been constantly reading Dancing The Dream and Moonwalk and healing very very slowly. It's hard, but I know I'll get there- for Michael's sake, if anything. He'd want me to carry on, you know. :> Michael's words are speeding up the healing process and that's good.
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by LittleSusie50 » Thu Jul 02, 2009 1:30 am

I can not believe that you posted this here Oldschoolfan. My hands are shaking as I type this reply. Only my mother knows this to be true, and she brought it to my attention in the aftermath.
I was doing some cleaning/purging in my apartment Wednesday, and I played some old school Jackson songs while I did. Not unusual, but I was really groovin that day!
The strange thing is, I tossed and turned ALL NIGHT on Wednesday. I did not get one wink! I kept feeling this strange looming feeling, like something really bad was gonna happen, I couldn't shake it!
I woke up a little after 12:30 after failing to get any sleep at all. I was talking to my mother about sumthing at work that upset me, and I started having chest pains like I had never experienced before. I thought I was having a heart attack. I couldn't catch a breath. My mom told me to sit down for a few minutes. She was gonna come and get me because she was so worried. After a few minutes, I was fine, but scared the pains may return. I went to was my face, and as I was rinsing the soap away, I felt that looming feeling again, but this time it was really intense to the point where I expected to see someone standing there when I finally opened my eyes. I just disregarded it as stress from talking about my job. I went downstairs to get my mail, and about an hour later my mom called to tell me that MJ was in the hospital. I don't need to tell you what i experienced hours later. It was my mother who remembered these events and recounted them to me later the next day. I was still in shock and had forgotten them. We didn't know what to make of it. I still don't. When I think about it now, it makes me cry even harder because I don't know what to make of it. I thought that I was losing my mind. Thank you Oldschoolfan.
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by Maiky » Thu Jul 02, 2009 3:07 am

I heard the news in ealry morning,
I had just woken up at 8 o' clock in the morning, and a friend of mine sent me an sms, saying that Michael was dead:(
At first I thought it was a joke and a false rumor:unsure:, but then I checked here, on Mjeol, and I found out that, unfortunately, that was true, that Michael was no longer with us... :icon_bluecry.
So, I went to my mother who was still in bed, she saw me and asked what was wrong, and I told her "there's a new angel in heaven", and told her what had happened. She too, is quite shocked for what has happened to him, even though she isn't a fan...But even my sister, who has never liked him at all, when she heard about that news, she was quite upset too....
I can only hope that now he is fine, in heaven...
I miss him so much :icon_bluecry

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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by kcparadox31 » Thu Jul 02, 2009 5:06 am

I'm pretty much in the same boat as oldschoolfan with the "coming back thing"...It's very comforting to see familiar names, and to be around people that feel the same loss.

I was being a lazy bum, surfing the internet and I hadn't seen anything yet when my older sister called me up and offered her condolences. I had no idea what she was talking about and she was very delicate about what she was trying to say, which is unlike her. Immediately I went to yahoo and read the headlines and his departure hadn't been mentioned yet. Then my phone started blowing up with texts from people wanting to check up on me.
I don't really have the words to express...I kept holding on to the hope that he would be ok. It seemed impossible to me that he could really be gone. Then I thought about the kids...they're right around the age my siblings and I were when my father was killed. That is what hit me the hardest. I feel like I've lost another family member. I haven't stopped tearing up since Thursday at the unfairness of it all. Being born in the mid 80's, while I'd been a fan since I was four, the Thriller, Bad and Dangerous eras passed without me being fully able to partake in his successes due to being too young and too poor. But I was old enough to be affected by the trial in 93 and all the mean things people would say because I was a fan. I had always hoped that I would be able to see his music...his art...his genius...his soul...celebrated for what we have always known. I had always hoped that his albums would be topping the charts, people would be sporting his gear and that people would be talking about his greatness. But never like this...

Honestly, I know I'm not alone when I say that my days are a little darker knowing that he isn't out there somewhere, playing with his kids or changing the world somehow. But it helps to know that his voice will never be silent and his love lives on in all the people that supported him through the good and the bad. I just wish he could have been here to enjoy the fruits that his tour would have yielded. But like my mom said, he's in a better place now. I imagine that he's on a stage up there, being welcomed with a standing ovation.
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\"Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius. - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by betty boop 84 » Thu Jul 02, 2009 4:45 pm

I was about to leave to work but I decited to quickly check the weather report first. So I turned on the tv and they were showing thriller and saying “this is what he’s remember of”. I just shouted no no nooooo!!!
I was almost late so I had to just run to the bus. I was shaking all the way. I don’t know how I made it through the day and even managed to be nice to clients. I didn’t want to turn on the radio. I didn’t want to think about it. At the end of the day I got home, came here and finally cried.
I haven’t watched the news since. I don’t want to hear anyone talking **** about him.
I’ve been so busy with work and my brother’s wedding coming up this weekend, I haven’t had much time to cry. Every now and then the pain hits me and I don’t know how to go on.:icon_bluecry
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How did you find out about Michael\'s death? :\'(

Post by mysteriousone » Fri Jul 03, 2009 2:37 am

My mum rang first and told me that Michael had been rushed to hospital! I actually laughed and replied, Mummm, I have told you numerous times, don't believe everything you hear and/or read! Then she told me to turn TV on and watch the sky news so I did! Still didn't register though, I never got worried, I just thought it was some joke, someone else in the ambulance! Then another friend rang and told me Michael had passed away, then several others rang from as far away as Australia--still, I wouldn't, couldn't believe it--I logged into Maximum Jackson to see what people were saying in there! I was dumbstruck guys, like so many others around the world I froze, I was empty, still am in a way! I couldn't function for a couple of days there--something had gone wrong, something terribly wrong, it was so sad! I'm doing okay now abeit still have an emptyish feeling inside of me--waiting for this investigation to be completed and test results that will come back from the Autopsies that were done! I need to know what happened to him, as do millions of others around the world!

Mysti!
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